We spend so much time identifying and thinking about our “negative” emotions like fear, doubt, disgust, anger, and sadness. The negative emotions play an extraordinarily important role in our lives but so do positive emotions and the positive emotions don’t get nearly as much screen time. Let’s get to know the “big ten” positive emotions.
Wait, What’s Important About Negative Emotions?
Good question! Most people assume that feeling sad or angry is a problem and it’s best to stop feeling that way and feel something good instead. Not so. The negative emotions give us important information and provide safety when needed. Anger, for example, is a defensive emotion and communicates “back up!” when you want something upsetting further away from you. Sadness elicits empathy and support when we need it most and fear keeps us from getting hit by cars by telling us “run!” when we are in danger. The negative emotions serve so many important functions that maximize safety and promote desirable boundaries. However, if all we ever felt were the negative emotions, we’d feel pretty miserable.
The “Ideal” Ratio
Some research says that people tend to function best when they experience about 3-5 instances of a positive emotion for every instance of a negative emotion. This is not to say that we should be down on ourselves if we tend to feel more frequent negative emotions, quite the opposite. There’s no need to criticize yourself instead lets consider some ways in which you can make more room for positivity.
Thinking of positive emotions usually evokes images of joy or happiness but there are ten positive emotions in all! What they all have in common is that they encourage exploration, playfulness, and creativity. The negative emotions tend to tell us to shut down but the positive emotions help us broaden our horizons.
Joy – a buoyant, playful feeling of happiness
Gratitude – recognition of one’s opportunities and gifts that often encourages giving
Serenity – a state of savoring calm
Interest – being intrigued and wanting to explore
Hope – the emotional belief that things will turn out how you want them to
Pride – recognizing accomplishments and feeling driven to dream big
Amusement – laughter at life’s guffaws and surprises
Inspiration – feeling moved to aspire to excellence
Awe – a sometimes-overwhelming recognition of what’s possible (as in noticing nature’s unbelievable beauty)
Love – deep respect and caring for another
If you’d like to feel positive emotions more often here’s an exercise:
Step 1: Choose a target emotion like love or serenity that resonates with you.
Step 2: Collect items (pictures, youtube clips, articles, etc.) that activate that feeling. Keep the collection somewhere that’s easy to access like in a file on your computer desktop.
Step 3: Review the contents of the file periodically and allow the target emotion to wash over you. Consider reviewing it when you are already feeling positively to savor that state. Alternatively, review the contents when you are feeling upset for a way to refocus your attention and boost your mood.